This last Wednesday I went to my first Bowen's Therapy appointment. If you aren't from Australia or you are, you may have never heard of this alternative holistic therapy. It's definitely different from any therapy I've ever done. It essentially focuses on getting our body back into balance by focusing on our fascia within the body. If you eat meat, you know that white stuff that you see on your steak or chicken breast? Yep, that's fascia that holds our muscle fibres together. It's an interesting therapy and I hope to do a review on it for you all towards the end!
But it's not the appointment I want to talk about, it's what my therapist said. She said that, "Before the age of 7, a lot of trauma that happens to us we dissociate. This is because our brains do not yet the capacity to deal with or comprehend what is happening or has happened." I found this quite interesting but it made sense, our brain is still developing greatly at this age but our brains will quickly realise that if we have to deal with that trauma and give it the attention that it needs to heal, we would not survive.
I found this incredibly interesting as I didn't remember my abuse and I've also realised that I didn't remember much of my childhood until 3 years ago; and even now, I don't remember a lot until I get dreams. It's incredible what the brain can do but it also worries me and raises the question, how can I help reduce the rates of sexual abuse in children if they are most likely not going to be able to comprehend what happens to them until they are much older?
In an article by the Australian Government, they found quite a fair bit of studies concerning how abuse affects a child's brain in a variety of aspects. It talks about how they have found that children who have been abused are more likely to have a language delay, issues with memory, over-response in emotional stimuli, or even an inability to self-regulate behaviours. In a study done on twins, they found that those that were exposed to domestic violence at a young age were likely to be 8 points lower on the IQ scale than the group that had not been exposed domestic violence.
The past 3 years, I thought I had just been experiencing PTSD, depression and anxiety but I have been quick to figure out that I am actually experiencing dissociation and I have been my whole life. As a child and teenager I always thought I had a great memory but to find out I was remembering what I needed to survive and forgetting what was truly there. Even now a days, I'm meeting people, hearing stories and pregnancy announcements and completely feeling like that event ever happened. Sometimes, I feel like I am doing an action like helping a customer in the store however, it is not me doing it but someone else doing those actions and I am looking down on it being done. It's an incredibly weird feeling but being able to put a name to what it is happening has made it less scary. I don't believe that anyones trauma has to be there as a lesson because hell no does anyone deserve to be abused in anyway. But for me it has definitely made me more resilient, wiser, stronger, re-own my truth & body, and guide where I want to go in my life.
Yes, I am still dealing with dissociation and PTSD but I'm getting there and I do believe that one day, I will be where I want to be. Healed or my life will be a long journey of healing and I am okay with that because I know that through this I want to work with other children and women that have experienced what I have. And I want to bring an end to women and children experiencing this, I want to find true prevention in this area. I believe it can be done, it may be hard and difficult but I do believe that we are not meant to suffer and with the right tools or protocols or laws, we will get to a place where every child and women can feel safe to in their minds and bodies.
Xoxo,
Moonli
McLean, S. (2016) The effect of trauma on the brain development of children. Australia. Australian Institute of Family Studies.
https://aifs.gov.au/cfca/publications/effect-trauma-brain-development-children
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