This is a post that I have been thinking about more lately when I hear constant stories of endometriosis impacting women's ability to get pregnant. I also did a question on my Instagram story asking others what they did to cope with the anxiety and they responded that they needed help with this too and were keen to see the responses. Unfortunately, I didn't get many positive ones but 1.
As a kid, I remember one day when we were in Florida, dealing with this horrible cottage cheese like and a fishy smell yeast infection that had been there for months and would never stop. I cried in the car about how I would never be able to have kids because of this ridiculous stuff coming out of my vagina. I now know that those are yeast infections, but yeast infections aren't entirely normal either. They are showing that there is probably an overgrowth of bacteria in the gut and the gut is the centre to the entire body.
The more stories I hear of women with endometriosis that are on their 7+ surgery and have lost a Fallopian tube, ovary, or had to have a full hysterectomy because of the scar tissue from endometriosis and past surgeries, I get worried. These aren't women in their 40's and 50's, these are women in their 20's and early 30's. Obviously, just because you have endometriosis, it doesn't mean that you will definitely have trouble getting pregnant. It is found that 40% of women diagnosed with endometriosis will have issues with infertility. Another important component to this stat is that, infertility does not mean that that couple can never get pregnant. Infertility relates to a couple that has been trying to conceive for over a year without any positive results.
My aunt was diagnosed with endometriosis and was told she would never able to have kids. She went out and got pregnant. I've met a woman, Fiona, who told me without acupuncture, herbs, supplements, and diet change she doesn't believe she would have been able to conceive her son naturally. But I think the true thing that keeps me going even with the stories I've heard, is what I have found through alternative medicine. The first book that I ever bought was Alternatives for Women With Endometriosis. I actually only bought it because it was the only book at this thrift store that talked about endometriosis. I bought it, read it, and it has given me so much hope. Many of these women had the surgeries and still found no relief. I have found that many of them decided to take charge and address everything going on around them. Including their diets, the toxins that they use in their homes, therapy for the mind, adding in supplements and acupuncture. I have addressed all of these and I must say that it's been amazing how much my pain has reduced. I even started acupuncture about 3 months ago now and I always get ovulation pain on my left side. This past cycle I got this crippling right side pain the day that I ovulated! Yes, it sucks that it was crippling but amazing that I finally ovulated from a side that I typically don't.
I still get anxiety about infertility some days but I notice most days that it kicks in is when I'm constantly listening to conventional medicine forums or blogs. That continually say that there is no cure and the only things that will help are excision surgery (average $17,000USD) and pelvic floor physical therapy, which if you don't have insurance or you do and this specialty is not covered it becomes very expensive! I get down and still worry about, what if I can never physically have kids? Or what if I continue to miscarry? It's something that has crossed my mind but now that I am 24, it is a very real thing that I think about.
I have always known that I wanted to adopt, since I was bout 6 years old I knew I would always adopt. So I know whether I can can physically have kids or not I would be adopting. For me, personally, I will not consider IVF. I think it is an amazing invention and so glad that many women are getting access to it but for my personal choice, I would rather put that money towards adopting a child and not put my body through the hormonal treatments to conceive. I also don't know how I feel about artificial insemination, it is not as expensive but I am still not entirely sure if that is a route I would take either. But I want to make clear, these are my personal decisions for myself and I am fully aware that these decisions for myself does not apply to everyone. I want every single women to make the best decision for them and themselves only.
My partner and I spend a lot of time talking about this, mostly from my end. He's not worried but he's not the one with the disease growing inside him. But emotional support is key I think. Whether that is from a partner, parent, friend, or therapist, it's good to have. If you hold all of those anxieties inside of you it can be extremely crippling.
I don't know what your journey looks like but this is mine. I'm 24, worried about infertility but incredibly hopeful and feel empowered by alternative medicines to treat my diseases. I hope this helps you, even if it doesn't release your anxieties about the problem, I hope that it lets you know that you are not alone.
Xoxo,
Moonli
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